Im so darn scared. I havent gave in to my husband. So it looks like its finally going through. So spending time what may be the last time I get to with my son. Havent heard from my husband for 2 hours. So no idea whats going on. Told my love a date. So darn scared im not going to keep it or this is all going to end badly. Im not happy. Im just scared and emotional. Scared that im going to hurt more people. Scared im going to give in to my husband or the devil inside me. Scared to get attached again. Scared of everything i have to do. Hoping if I spend tonight alone ill find a way to keep my mind busy. Scared to have any hope. Just so scared.
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